There are many reasons why it is important to spend time with loved ones. Even with couples who don’t get a lot of time together due to conflicting schedules, the time that is spent together makes the rest of the world go away just for a little bit. It can still be easy for the outside world to sneak into time spent with loved ones, however. What if it crept right in between the both of you, creating a wall of frustration? This happens all the time, and the culprit is probably in your hand right now: your cell phone.
There’s no question that smartphones are amazing and bring a lot of information right to our fingertips, but they also can bring frustration and alienation to a relationship. Texting can often creep into the time that we spend with our loved ones, and even when both partners are doing it, it can be frustrating. That being said, there are relationship benefits to texting too.
How does texting benefit a relationship?
- Creates time together: Whether a couple is in a literal long distance relationship, or it’s just a relationship that feels that way due to conflicting schedules and business trips, texting back and forth can help create time together even when physically apart. It will help keep the connection alive.
- Helps a couple stay in touch: When going about busy days and trying to make plans together, texting can be convenient and comfortable. Quick reminders here, little notes of encouragement and love there -it all helps get things done and stay in touch when life threatens to pull you apart.
- Enhances communication: Sometimes it can be tricky to say things properly in person, and texting can offer another outlet. Whether it’s getting over a fight, telling your partner how much you care about them, or simply keeping in touch during a tense time as a couple, texting gives that boost and slight anonymity to the communication that can be really beneficial at times – when used correctly.
- Creates intimacy: From sending private photos, sexting, and more, texting can offer a sense of connection and intimacy, whether what you share with each other is considered racy or not. From PG to R related material, texting offers intimacy and keeps the spark alive.
How can it harm a relationship?
- It distracts you from your partner: When you’re watching a movie or enjoying some time together with your partner, being on your phone can be a distraction from what’s going on. This can lead to poor communication, along with other problems within a relationship.
- It can lead to resentment: If there is one partner that is always texting no matter what you’re doing (yes, that includes in the bedroom), the other partner might begin to feel resentful toward the phone, their partner, and even the person they’re talking to. Texting shouldn’t come in between a couple, but if it does, it’s a sign that maybe one partner (or both) needs to take a look at their priorities.
What to learn from it:
As you can see, texting has its advantages and its downfalls, so knowing where that line is between positive and negative is really important. If you’re not sure where that line is, talk to your partner and explain your concerns.You may find it’s easier to talk about than you thought, and they’ll appreciate that you cared enough to bring it up.
Texting can help a relationship stay alive and well when used properly, so don’t be afraid to make it a part of the relationship. Just make sure that you bring your partner along with you!
Pivotal Counseling Center has therapists who work with couples and specialize in couples counseling and relationship issues. We have locations in Woodstock, Illinois, and Lake in the Hills, Illinois. If you are in need of someone to help, please consider giving us a call at (815) 345-3400.
