The dating world has entered the digital age. Gone are the days where couples would have chaperones until marriage, or go on dates to drive-ins, and grab milkshakes. Now, it’s all about online dating through websites or social media sites such as Tinder or Snapchat. With this brand new library of options for finding the right partner comes pros and cons. The pros and cons need to be talked about and understood to get the most out of online dating.
Pros of Online Dating
Lots of websites to choose from:
There are all sorts of apps and dating websites available online. You can make sure that you are introducing yourself to the right group of people that meet the needs and standards that are important to you. You have a wide selection and you can make it work for you however you want it to. There’s a lot of freedom that way.
Helps you meet multiple people:
Since dating online is so popular, you’ll have access to a lot of people. You won’t even need to meet the ones that you know are not going to work out. From chatting online to scanning profiles, you’ll know quickly which ones you’re interested in meeting and which ones you’d rather not follow up on.
It will help you find what you’re looking for:
Since a lot of these sites and apps are based on lengthy personality tests, they are great for making sure that you are only matching up with people that your “kind” of people. This could be criteria for personalities or ambitions, or even the kind of relationship that you’re looking for.
It’s intended for modern living:
Online dating websites and apps understand that you are living fast-paced lives. They will work with you to help you find a more convenient way to scan for people you’re interested in, whether it’s mobile compatibility or instant messaging. This is intended to help you keep on top of dating without it being inconvenient. Talk about modern life!
Cons of Online Dating
Can be awkward:
There’s no question that online dating can be awkward. Whether you talk for the first time in person, or you spend time IMing or even using a video chat service, it can still be strange to meet in person. After all, this is a complete stranger that you met online…it sounds like a recipe for a good horror movie. The truth is, it’s awkward for both people, and you need to remember to give yourselves time to adjust to it and get to know each other properly.
Sometimes the person behind the profile is not what you expect:
There’s always the possibility that the online person and the real-life person don’t match up well. We all tend to be more confident and open online and then clam up in person, so don’t be too disappointed if jitters and nerves get in the way of your connection. It takes time to get comfortable with real interaction, and sometimes it just isn’t the right match and won’t work out. There’s nothing wrong with that, either.
Can amplify insecurities:
If you happen to enter into a relationship where you’re tied down to someone you met online, a lot of times there can be insecurities that set in. Dating websites can often be places where married partners will look to have affairs. This is not, of course, always the case, but you do need to be careful in getting to know the person. Online profiles only allow you to see what the creator wants you to, so you need to do your own research in real life to make sure that everything is as it seems. This kind of dating tends to bring out the paranoia in all of us.
The Bottom Line
The truth of the matter is that online dating may be something that you are okay with and excited about, or it may not. There’s no harm in giving it an honest try, and no matter what the results are, you can say that you checked it out. There are both positives and negatives about dating online, but the outcome is whatever you want it to be!
Pivotal Counseling Center has therapists who work with couples and specialize in couples counseling and relationship issues. We have locations in Woodstock, Illinois, and Lake in the Hills, Illinois. If you are in need of someone to help, please consider giving us a call at (815) 345-3400.
Pivotal Counseling Center is now accepting Medicaid including Blue Cross Community Medicaid, Meridian Medicaid, and Molina Medicaid for outpatient counseling.
